CENTRAL COAST CRIME WAVE

Seems like I’ve arrived in the tiny California town of Cayucos in the middle of a crime wave sweeping the Central Coast.

 Police and sheriff’s officers appear to be having their resources stretched to breaking point while dealing with incessant calls from concerned residents reporting “crimes” ranging from illegally parked shopping carts to noisy parrots.

Here are some extracts from the police logs published in the two local newspapers, The Tribune and Bay News:

*A resident reported that a shopping cart was in front of a house. 
*A person said two people on bicycles were looking at children. Offficers who responded said the two were merely looking for a restroom.
*A resident reported that a stepping stone was taken from his yard.
 *A resident called the police department to report that a police car was parked outside her house.
*A resident said a man looked over her fence and talked to her dog that morning and did the same the day before at 4a.m. Officers advised the resident of her options.

Rush hour in Cayucos

*A woman complained that a parrot on a man’s shoulder was squawking at her.
And, most bizarrely,
*A man called police from Iraq saying subjects were using his wife’s email account to have drugs sent to 1417 Riverside Avenue. Officers said there is no such address.

Phew! With crime so rampant across the area it’ll be a relief to get back to relatively crime-free  city of Santa Monica.